Dentists do it orally...

A woman goes to the dentist. When he bows to begin to work, she grabs his balls. The dentist says, "Madam, I believe you have taken my private zone." The woman answers, "Yes. We're going to be careful not to hurt each other, aren't we."

I floss more than once a day, I brush two to three times per day, I chew sugarless gum with xylitol after every meal and yet I have the most unbelievable lack of luck with my damn teeth. I'm 29 years old and I already have 4 or 5 crowns and that might just be a little generous... anyway, while eating my chicken ceasar salad today I crunch down on what I think is a chicken bone, but its a small sliver of my tooth!!!! This is not the first time I've done this. You would think this would happen with starbursts, milk duds, or salt water taffy, but NO, a lousy piece of baked chicken. UNBELIEVABLE!!! last time I was pregnant the same thing happened with a friggin granola bar.

Did I mention its right at the gum line inbetween two molars, so I am forever getting large pieces of food stuck inbetween them! I can't live like this, I HATE food in my teeth, you know that feeling when you get a popcorn kernal stuck between your two front teeth and it feels like there is a 5 mile wide clamp forcing them to split like the red sea??? THAT is how it feels. So, I'm going to have to sit in the dentist chair AGAIN with no novacaine and just deal with the pain of fixing the tooth - isn't there an epidural that works from the eyeballs down???

I must say, I sat here at my desk laughing when I thought of the tooth debacle of this past Christmas when Alana lost a chip of tooth at the table while we were eating and began to sob. I just thought, geez, this kid ain't seen NUTHIN YET!!! You would have thought that her front tooth had been knocked out - now THAT is something to cry about... anyway...

The things we do for our children.